365 Days To A Better Me

Day 93: Pillow Fight

2010-04-03T20:34:00.000-07:00

Let me start by saying that Last night was CRAZY!!!!

I figured I would follow it up today by working. By work I mean to help my buddy out with the travel show we have been putting together. We heard about the "International Pillow Fight Day" event that was happening in Pershing Square and decided that we needed to be a part of it.

Apparently all over the world there were massive pillow fights as close to simultaneously as could be imagined. There were over 1500 people downtown duken' it out. Ten minutes into it I felt like I was in a blizzard. A disgusting germ filled pillow stuffing blizzard... nut a blizzard no less. I will amend this post when I get some still photos of the debacle. It was a blast!

I am just wondering who gets clean it up!?!

Day 92: Glam Rockin'

2010-04-02T18:27:00.000-07:00

Tonight I have a party to go to...

It is not just any party, no, it happens to be an 80's Glam Rock theme party. I just want to say that Liz has gone all out and continues to cement her place as the best GF in the world. She has me completely decked out all the way to the david bowie labyrinth-esque wig. We are getting ready to hit the road and let me just say... I'm wearing guy-liner. Below the neck I have an 80's rock band shirt with a blazer. The sleeves have been rolled up and I am backin' it up with some very loud silk scarves. Steven Tyler would be proud!

It is kinda nice to throw caution to the wind every once in a while. Tonight is especially daring considering this party is in the middle of a steak house. The majority of the other customers have no clue what is about to hit them!

Rock On!!!

Day 91: Four

2010-04-01T21:47:00.000-07:00

Okay... Let me start by saying WHERE THE HELL DID A MONTH GO?

I understand that I am a bit behind on my posts here, but this is almost out of hand. I assure you that I have not been lazy for 31 days. I have actually been extremely busy. I have a whole host of posts (look... it rhymes) that are waiting to be logged in here.

[Rather than letting the blog flounder and be forgotten I decided to start fresh on April fools and to add the older posts in as we go.]

Like I said, I have been really busy. There have been some ups and some downs over the past ninety days and I can honestly say that I am happy with where things are headed even if nothing has really changed. 1/4 of a year into this mess I am:

Still smoking
Still broke
Still plugging away at a job I am not happy in
Still fat and injured

That being said I am also:

Happily in love
On track to fix #3 of the previous section
Healed on one foot completely
1/4 of a year wiser

I'm looking forward to telling you about the upcoming adventure I hope to be on shortly. Right now though I am excited about finishing my 14 hour day and going to bed.

It's good to be back...

Day 64: Set Backs

2010-03-05T21:18:00.000-08:00

I had written that I was really excited about some potential great news… well… it didn’t pan out. I had two things working to possibly launch my career into a better spot. I was really excited about both of them. Unfortunately for one reason or another they both didn’t pan out. I am pretty bummed out about the whole thing. I was getting very anxious about the possibility of a new direction. Granted there are a lot of other opportunities out there and so I shouldn’t get too down on myself. It is still very hard to swallow at the moment.

...Back to the drawing board.

Day 63: Mop Choppin'

2010-03-04T20:06:00.000-08:00

I chopped my mop! I know this doesn’t seem like a post worthy event, but my locks were LOOOOONG! My hair was longer than I think it has ever been. I looked at myself in the mirror and didn’t like the greasy looking guy staring back at me. It was time! I had been rocking the longer hair for about eight months and I have firmly decided that I do not know guys like Mathew McConaughey do it. The minute my hair touched my shoulders there was a huge problem.

So I cut it all off. Liz and I have been watching the show Spartacus a lot and when she questioned how short I had gone I merely replied with “I could be a gladiator.” She was scared at first, but she quickly warmed up to the new look! All I know is there is a breeze on my neck and that makes me happy!

Day 62: New Meeting... Old Friends

2010-03-03T19:14:00.000-08:00

A while back I wrote that I had gone to dinner with a friend of mine. He had mentioned that he was working on something that he was hoping I would help him with. Tonight we got together with a few regulars we work with and mapped out the launch of a completely new online community showcasing short form (5 minutes and under) content that is both original and user created. I can’t go too far into it just yet, but I am sure you will really like it… if you are into what it is about that is!

It is refreshing to get these things going. While it does occupy a fair amount of my free time I feel that in the long run it will ultimately be very worth it! Experience is one thing, but I feel this has some pretty good money making potential. It is important to listen to your gut instinct on things like this. If you like the idea than it is probably worth a second look. If it doesn’t really speak to you and you are working with friends then you should probably let them know it isn’t for you up front. I have seen a lot of people ruin relationships over projects they never wanted to be a part of in the first place. Hopefully, if you are truthful, your friend will understand. If they don’t then maybe you need to re-evaluate the friendship!

Luckily for me, I am very excited about it and I can’t wait to get more details on it to share with you!

Day 61: The Gym

2010-03-02T17:11:00.000-08:00

Seeing that I can’t run right now thanks to my over-zealous desire and an aging body I have decided to hit the gym. This is interesting because I have not reallyworked out in about two years. Of course I did a lot of cardio, but as anyone who does actually train their muscles, they are far from the same thing. I am SORE! No… Like REAAAALLLY SOOORRRE! I figure this will be a good way to get things back on track though. Even though I am not allowed to be as active as I would like for a while I still can get the muscle fibers working. I can’t let this injury get me down and I sure can’t sit on my butt until I get better.

So for now I am trying to get to the gym three to four times a week. It has started off well and I hope that I can keep it up. I am sure something is going to come up in the near future that will test my dedication and when it does I have faith that I will push through. I will keep you posted on how things are going.

Day 60: Tres

2010-03-01T20:31:00.000-08:00

Here we are... March first.

I feel that this year is already starting to fly by. I still don't see much progress. There is a quite a bit of effort being exerted though and I have to hope that a bit more time is all I need to turn the tide. I am excited to continue to focus on creative projects and I plan on really hunkering down on my workout routine. I did very well last week and hit the gym four times.

It seems like there are a few people actually reading this... which is cool because I haven't really tried to plug it. This was the day that I said I was going to tell people about it. Sixty days seemed like a number that showed that I was serious about this. As I have said in the past, I don't want to give lip service any more. I want to follow through on the things I am talking about and continue the commitment to become a better person.

I hope that one or two the things I am talking about in here are hitting home for you as you read along and I am excited to hear what you have to say. I am also happy to answer, or at least try to answer, any questions you may have. I have never claimed to be all knowing, but a rare gem has been known to slip here and there.

I thank you for reading this and for your continued support. I look forward to what this month has to offer and what I can bring to this month. Happy March!

Day 59: Executive Course

2010-02-28T17:21:00.000-08:00

I am SOOOOO proud of Liz!

We have been playing golf for a little over three and a half weeks and she finished her first nine holes today! Granted, we didn't keep score and it was a Par 3 executive course, but none the less she DID it! I would have to say it was a bit of trial by fire to boot. I kinda threw her to the wolves so to speak. I didn't explain much about chipping or ball lie. The first thing we learned was pace of play. More precisely that there is one.

After she ditched her skinny latte we were in good shape. She was doing exceptionally well for her first time and made a few really good shots. As we moved through the holes I took the time to explain some of the finer point of the game and the rules. She finished up very strong. Strong enough that she wanted to go to the range and continue to practice.

Afterwards she even wanted to go look for clubs at Golfsmith. Did I mention that I think I have created a monster. Soon enough she is going to be kicking my ass. I just can't get over how well she is doing in such a short time. I guess I know what to get her for her birthday coming up.

Day 58: LBC

2010-02-27T20:09:00.000-08:00

Liz and I hit up Long Beach today for the LA Golf Show. Let me just say that I think I have created a monster! We wanted to go practice a bit, but the weather didn't permit it. It was a pretty good time at the show. Liz got a chance to see some photos really cool courses. This is important because she now is stoked to take a golf vacation... as soon as we can finish a full course that is.

We left the show and toured around downtown Long Beach. It amazes me that I have lived here for 3 years 11 months and 11 days and there are still cool places I have never been to. I highly recommend a trip there during the day. It is really beautiful. We went and ate in Belmont Shores at a place called The Creperie. We actually ran into a bunch of my old neighbors from Hollywood in random fashion. Made even more random due to the fact that they live in Austin and Boston now.

All in I would say it was a pretty great day! I think we are going to take it easy tonight and I am not complaining! I could use an easy night in with a beautiful woman watching movies. So, I going to do just that...

Day 57: Stepping Out

2010-02-26T19:51:00.000-08:00

Last night was great. It was really awesome getting a chance to hang out with Tyler and Paul. I love being around creative people because it ignites a flame in me that seems to have flickered a bit slower as of recent. Tyler is one of the more creative people I know and it really gets me thinking when I am around him.

I realized that over the course of the past two years I have become more sheltered with my ideas and lackadaisical about actively turning them into reality. I have fallen in to a menial existence that is predicated on making a check to pay the months bills only to worry about the next ones. I am counting days until money arrives in order to try to get through the difficult ones at hand. Is this really living??? I say no!

I have to come to realize that I am so worried about tomorrow that I am forgetting about today. I don't mean to take away from any of the things I have said about forward thought and goal setting. I merely am trying to draw a line to differentiate the good forethought from the very bad.

I have also come to realize that the only way I can fix this situation is to open my eyes and step out of the line I have been so begrudgingly trudging. I think a perfect way to start is to take a look at some of the creative projects I have in my life and starting to put a bit more effort into seeing them to fruition.

I think I have been a bit scared to put myself out there for a while ( there is a back-story... I will get to it), and the fear of failure is sitting at the head of my emotional class. I have to get around this! I have to find my fire again!

I guess the only thing to do is to beat back that fear (which has never been a problem for me previously), and find a way to remember the person I once was. I definitely know he is still there someplace. So, I am stepping out! I am removing myself from the line and I am choosing a different path. I am not sure where that path will take me, but hopefully it will be in the right direction. I am not quitting my job and moving to Paris! No no... I would definitely choose London if I was going to do something that crazy! I am, however, going to put myself back out there!I guess the best way to put is... in order to effect change in one's life one needs to change.

Here's to change

Day 56: Old Friends

2010-02-25T23:04:00.000-08:00

I haven't always lived over in Santa Monica. I used to live in a truly kick ass apartment in Hollywood. The building I lived in was built in 1929 and has some serious history. I was extremely lucky to have met some of my dearest friends there. At one point there was a group of about 15 neighbors that all congregated on the rooftop patio for BBQ's and drinks.

I hardly get back over there, but tonight Liz and I are going out for drinks with our two favorite people from the building, Tyler and Paul. Tyler and I have some Film and TV projects we are working that we needed to discuss. Tyler is launching a new horror community on the net and he wants me to help him produce to original programing. I, of course, am stoked.

I am really looking forward to hearing about what he has to say, but I am actually mainly excited to be around some good friends. I have been a little down this week and getting around these people is almost guaranteed laughter. I need that right now...

I will keep you posted on what comes of the meeting!

Day 55: Postponed

2010-02-24T20:46:00.000-08:00

SOOO...

I work my butt off on the presentation I was supposed to give this week sometime, right?!?! I was a bit inquisitive as to why I had not been informed as to when the meeting was. Much to my disappointment, the President of the company I am presenting to has been called away for upwards of a month. This is bad news!

This means all of that work that was fresh in my mind and ready to be delivered in mind-blowing fashion has now been shelved. I have been asked to hold off for a month! At least! I am afraid that the presentation I crafted is going to get shelved in my consciousness and I am not going to remember the delivery, intent, and cadence when it comes time to retrieve it. God forbid it go shelved next to "College Memories," I think they are still drunk! If that is the case I will probably only remember half of it!

Needless to say, my demeanor hasn't changed much since yesterday. I just hope that I get through the rest of this week unscathed!

Day 54: The Wait

2010-02-23T22:36:00.000-08:00

Everyday I wake up and I think that things are going to be different. I rise in the morning and I think to myself that today is going to be the day that changes everything. The catalyst that makes all of the work that I have been putting in worth it. The one day that gets me out of debt and takes 50 unwanted pounds off my body...

That day hasn't come!

The hardest thing about initiating major change in ones life is the wait to see them take effect. I talked about setting small goals to alleviate some of these issues, but there is still going to be an amount of time that is necessary to allow for the roots of change to grab hold of the soil that is ones life.

A good axiom is that Rome wasn't built in a day. While this may be true I seem to think that there were a lot of pissed off Romans that had to wait.

I try to be upbeat on this thing, but sometimes it is a bit hard. I want everyone to know that this is a struggle. A damn hard one at that. Right now I have faith that things will eventually get better and that my roots will grow. I just wish someone would throw me some freakin' Miracle Grow!

Day 53: Anonymous

2010-02-22T20:10:00.000-08:00

"Man, good job so far! I hope you keep on writing somehow and somewhere..."

What you are looking at is my very FIRST comment! I am so stoked that:

Someone is reading this!
They think I am doing a decent job!
They want me to continue!

I have only told a few people that I am even doing this and, of the people I have told, have only given the address out to one person! That means that said anonymous comment was from a genuine person that I don't even know!!! I am pretty excited about that.

I would like to hear more from whomever is actually reading out there. It gives a little bit of purpose to what goes into this and I guess that is the true intention of this whole project. I wanted to commit to something that is all mine that truly only I will know if I give up on. The goal is to not give up!

I hope the people out there reading this are still enjoying it and I want to thank you for your time Anonymous! It meant a lot to me that you decided to let me know how you felt!

Day 52: Lazy

2010-02-21T14:17:00.000-08:00

Wow... last night was one for the record books! Liz and I are having a hard time moving from the couch. We want to go to the driving range, but our bodies aren't complying with our minds.

I believe that it is okay to take a break sometimes! It is important not to burn yourself out entirely. If you let yourself recharge a bit then the fight to push forward on your path of determination becomes a bit easier. Sometimes this is made even easier with Domino's pizza! Om nom nom nomm om. Sorry... I know... it is a weak moment. Like I said, I think it is okay as long as you rebound the next day and push twice as hard!

Must... seek... couch!

Day 51: 40 Years

2010-02-20T16:05:00.000-08:00

Over the past few months I have been sharing my fears of turning 30 with a friend of mine whos shares the same fears about turning 40. Tonight is his big night! He is leaving his 30's in style at an enormous party being thrown for him at the W hotel in Hollywood. It is interesting to explore why humans put such weight on aging into a new decade of life. There are so many social stigmas placed on age that it becomes very harrowing as we approach a turn into a new decade of life. There are constant questions that arise in your mind as you contemplate your existence and try to compare yourself to an outdated standard that, for some reason, we still attribute to our age. For example, it has been a wide assumption for years that people are supposed to be married with kids before they are thirty. I know two people that fall into this category in my life.

The social climate has changed and thereby so should the stigmas! 40 is no longer old! "Over the hill" is a passe term! Long live "the 30's are the new 20's!" I refuse to comply to social stigmas and I invite you to create your own!

Day 50: Presenting

2010-02-19T23:03:00.000-08:00

WOW 50 Days!

Let me start by saying that Power Point is not my best program! I have been working on a presentation for one of my clients over the past two weeks. It has been a pretty gruling task to say the least. I finaly gave a dry run of the finished product to the head of the company this afternoon. I was showcasing the presentation to them before we go to their bosses to actually present in a few weeks. Even though it has taken me quite a while to compile it I would have to say it has been well worth it!

Now, Power Point might not be my forte, but presenting sure is! You can put me in front of 250,000 people and I would eat it up. I have always loved it. I walked out of the meeting today knowing that I killed it! I knocked it out of the park! They President and Vice-President of the company were so excited about what I created for them that they gave me a cigar... which is a pretty big deal LOL! Seriously though I could see the appreciation in their eyes for what I had done for them. My hard work was evident and has secured a lasting relationship with that client.

I'm not saying all of this to get a pat on the back. I am more saying it to emphasize the point that if you try hard enough and practice long enough good things come about. I didn't know Power Point before getting thrown into this mess and to be honest it is way above my job expectations that I created it, but I was dillegent! I powered through to figure it out and secured a sale that perhaps would have been lost otherwise.

This is important to think about in times that are difficult. If you go the extra mile for those around you I promise it will get noticed and you will ultimately see the benefits from it!

Day 49: Cutting

2010-02-18T19:01:00.000-08:00

One of the things that I have been focused on this year so far is to focus on my hobbies. As I have said in previous posts I used to be devoted to the film industry. After getting a little burnt out I took a step back and redirrected my energy toward the aspects that I could do in my spare time and that I got the most joy from. The result was an increase in editing jobs. My roomate recently put me in touch with a prospective client that has a show tha needs to be cut and I have been tasked with the job.

I love to edit because it allows me to get outside my head. All the stuff I am trying to change in my life right now can be daunting and a bit overwhelming. Sometimes it helps to just remove myself from the thoughts completely. Editing does this for me! In all reality it is a form of creative thearapy. It is important to take a step back sometimes, and when I am cutting that is exactly what happens. I don't worry about my phone or my email... I just focus on the task at hand. In this case it is to create a kick-ass travel show.

I think it is important that everyone have something like this. It doesn't have to be editing either, it could be knitting if that is what does it for you. Times are hard right now for everyone, but it is important that we don't lose sight life. Having something in your life that allows you to enjoy the day, even for a moment, makes a world of difference.

Day 48: Flu Shots

2010-02-17T18:58:00.000-08:00

So, after much deliberation I decided to get the H1N1 flu vacine a while back. I haven't gotten a flu shot since I was like ten years old and I seem to make it through the season every year unscathed. It seems to me that the people that get the shots end up getting sick more often than not. I know that my thought process is not based in any sort of evidence compounded from a medical journal, not that thaey would publish it there, but I really believe it true.

Ergo, I was VERY apprehensive about getin the H1N1 shot. The thinng is... I have been sick since I got it! I never get sick and I have been sick for almost three months off and on. I am going crazy! It is very hard to find the energy to go to the gym to further my battle with weight loss when I can hardly get out of bed. At this point I also think I should be given stock in Kleenex. I am so ready to be healthy again. I wonder if anyone else feels the same way I do?

Day 47: 5 People

2010-02-16T20:36:00.000-08:00

Okay, now that The Alchemist has left my life for a while ( I am still deciding who to give my copy too so if you want it... let me know) there is definitely a vacancy on my bookshelf. I have been looking for another book to read whilst trying to put off reading Allan Carr's The Easy Way To Quit Smoking. I am by no means the type of person who reads a lot of self-help or inspirational books, however, I feel that now more than ever may be a time to indulge.

A co-worker of mine was telling me about a book by the author Mitch Albom, you may remember Tuesday's With Morrie. I loved this book a lot! I also highly recommend this, but I have already read it, and unlike The Alchemist once may be enough. He did recently write another book that seems like it may have some bearing on what is going on in my life right now.

The Five People You Meet In Heaven is officially next on the list! It apparently starts 50 minutes before the main character, Eddie, dies in a horrible accident. The end is the begining because the book takes place in Heaven and details... well... the five people you meet there. It is more a retrospective on life and judging ones self worth, which for the most part, is what I am doing to myself right now. I figure it may give a bit of insight to what this whole thing is about.

Oddly, I am excited to read another inspirational book. As I said before they are not on the top of my charts and I usually have to stagger them out a few months. For some reason this one just... fits.

I still need to go get it, but I feel that it will fill the void left very well. I will update you as I go along as to the intriguing points. Until then, I will be waiting to see who wants a copy of The Alchemist..

Day 46: Holidays

2010-02-15T16:31:00.000-08:00

I am going to revert back for a moment to the Monday after the Super Bowl, or "Super Monday" as it were, to bring up the fact that Presidents day is stupid! Don't get me wrong, I fully agree that there should be a day devoted to our Presidents. Furthermore I believe it should be a national holiday. Is too much to ask that the damn thing coincide with the Super Bowl? It is like a week later! More importantly NO ONE observes it! Sure, schools and government agencies do, but hell, UPS even delivers!

I am not trying to bad mouth this day... I just think there should have been some forethought into the whole thing. Imjussayin...

Day 45: V-Day

2010-02-14T20:48:00.000-08:00

Cue Wagner's booming classical overture "Ride of The Valkyries"

Valentine's Day! What a day. Some people akin it to single's awareness day (SAD for short). Others, mainly female, seem to think that there is a special type of magic tat can happen on this day. They stand firm that for 24 hours there is nothing that can go wrong in this world. I would venture to say that 80% of said group is sorely disappointed by about 2PM. There is yet another faction that tends to disregard the day exists and scorns the thought of it to any who may broach the subject.

I like to think that I am somewhere in the middle of all of this. I am always excited at the prospect of a romantic day and now that Liz and I have been through three of them we both are beginning to realize that the thing that truly matters on this silly day is that you are spending it with the one you love. The monetary gifts don't matter as much as the quality time spent being with each-other.

We kept it easy this year for gifts. We both know where we stand with our money so I asked her not to do anything for me and she did the same for me. I assumed she listened to me... we all know what a dumb-ass I would be had I listened to her. I ended up getting her a really cheesy card that happened to actually have a meaningful script in it and a makeup bag. Hers had broken about a month ago. I was very excited to get her something that she would really use and that she would really appreciate. She, of course didn't listen to me and got me two t-shirts and a kick-ass gym bag from Puma.

After we traded gifts we headed over to a Sunday brunch space called the Overland Cafe. They happen to have a $4.99 all you can drink champagne special until 2PM. Two bottles later we "Floated" a couple of blocks away to the driving range and spent close to three hours there. It was awesome! We ordered a couple of beers on the range and I finally sold Liz on the whole idea. She is hooked! She did extremely well and I was very proud of her.

We spoke with an older gentleman for about forty minutes. He was very interesting. He was waiting to go pick up his girlfriend from the mall to take her out to dinner when she got off work. Mind you he is 89 and she was 70! He told us about WWII, designing suits for men, and how beautiful Liz was multiple times. It really was a blast.

I am so thankful to have such a great friend for a partner and I couldn't have asked for a better day. I hope that you all had a great day as well and that your night continues accordingly. Good luck!

Day 44: Mardi Gras

2010-02-13T09:29:00.000-08:00

A buddy of mine is having a Mardi Gras party tonight, or I should say his wife is. I got a frantic phone call yesterday explaining that she had been planning it but "forgot" to mention it to him so that he could invite his friends. If I didn't know that his wife was the sweetest person on earth I would have to say that the whole thing stunk as bad as the French Quarter. It seems rather convenient that, save myself and one other, all of his less civilized single friends didn't make the cut. Ah, the married life!

I am completely jazzed about the whole thing though. She is making muffaletta sandwiches and Hurricanes. She is bringing in Zapps chips, Abita beer, and, most importantly, a king cake ( with plastic babies). For those of you who don't know what a king cake is just imagine a huge cinnamon roll with bright icing on the top. As you're delighting in the delectable danish derivative chance may have it that you gnaw into a plastic baby doll. This is told to bring luck and prosperity in the coming year. That is what Mardi Gras is all about after all, having a party and living it up before Ash Wednesday can come along to make you repent it all away.

This should be a pretty good one though and I look forward to the upcoming festivities. Technically I have a few more days before I have to get serious about Lent ( I will touch base on this Wednesday if you are confused). Right now... I am going golfing. I just hope that I don't beat these guys so bad that they want to give golf up for forty days! Enjoy your day!

Day 43: Boys Night Out

2010-02-12T19:55:00.000-08:00

So I am pretty excited about tonight. I am getting a chance to go out with some of my guys that I haven't spent much time with lately. Were heading into Hollywood to hit up a fancy club for my very good friend's birthday party. The cool part about it is that the guys I am heading out there with have never met each-other. Normally I am a bit apprehensive to sticking a bunch of strange people together, however, tonight I feel completely okay with the whole thing. These guys individually are some of the most intelligent and reverent people I know so I am guessing that putting everyone together should be quite an event.

I guess this is relevant to this blog because all of these friends have come into my life within the past three years, some as recent as the past six months! I am thankful for them though... I feel that I have been through a lot when it comes to friends and at this point in my life I have developed a good enough bull-shit sensor to pick out the people that are going to be beneficial to my life in some way. The good lord knows that there is a constant onslaught of those who would be detrimental. I would be lying if I said that I never met anyone like that... but I do have to say that there aren't any left in my life at this point and that if I choose to bring friends in it is because I truly think that they are looking out for my best interests as I am theirs.

It is a long journey to understand why this is important. Some may never actually understand it. I thank god on the reg that I have come to understand it... and I thank him for bringing me the people that do truly care about me. I hope this entry gets you thinking about who is in your life and how they factor into your mix. Life is short... I hope that you are the type of friend you want to have in your life! Most of the time your friends are mirror images of your own behaviors. Take a moment and ponder that...

Day 42: Regroup

2010-02-11T22:14:00.000-08:00

I want to take a moment to get some things off my chest that I figure might need to be said at this point...

Let me start by saying that I want everyone to understand that I do NOT think that I have all of the answers. I hope that my ramblings don't make me sound like an ass. I know sometimes I can get a bit preachy, but it is usually only because I am talking about a something that I am passionate about. I hope that I am the last person to actually bring a "holier than thou" attitude to the plate. Please, please, PLEASE let me know if I ever start to sound that way. I like to think that the reason I am doing this is because I don't know squat and that is kinda the impetus to the whole thing. My main concern is that whoever is reading this realize that I have made mistakes that I am trying desperately to fix. I hope that if you are in a similar situation you can use my advice to not be where I am right now. I sure as hell don't want to sound like a self righteous ass in the process though...

I am sure I am going to have to go back and reference this post once every six months or so. I am okay with that as long as the point of the project is coming across. Thanks again for taking the time to read along with me and I hope that I can help you a bit with the trials you are going through.

Dustin

Day 41: Big day

2010-02-10T21:00:00.000-08:00

I had a very big meeting today. I followed the rules set forth in the Alchemist recently and have allowed myself to be open to the world around me. I can't quite explain what that means just yet... but it is life altering! I was very excited for today and, overall, I think it went exceedingly well.

I think that when someone is trying to actively change something in their life people notice. Not just the inner circle of people you deal with on the day to day. I am more specifically referring to casual interactions. Its like you have an glow that shines brighter when you are happy and working toward the better overall you. It is hard to explain, but I have noticed a difference in the way people are interacting with me.

I think it could also be a bit of the excitement of really trying to take over my life. I feel more alive today than I have in a long while. As more details become available on my meeting I will fill you in...

Day 40: Alchemless

2010-02-09T18:57:00.000-08:00

I finished the Alchemist today. Again, it seems to come into my life at the most useful times. It amazes me how much insight one story can give you on your life, on multiple occasions, in many different ways, throughout multiple readings.

I hope that some of you may have read it by now and can agree with me in the previous statement. I have a lot of tough decisions looming in my life right now and I can honestly say that re-reading this book has brought much clarity into the process.

For those of you that haven't read it, I urge you to again! Everyone can take something away from this book...

To following your personal legend!

Day 39: Super Monday

2010-02-08T20:56:00.000-08:00

I read an article today in which someone proposed the idea that the Monday following the Super Bowl be deemed a national holiday. I completely agree! While I didn't even drink yesterday, I know a lot of people that did! I think that driving on the 405 this morning was exponentially more dangerous than any other day of the year due to the fact that I am pretty sure the majority of the drivers were still probably drunk! To make matters worse I have a stomach bug and would have loved to not even come into to work at all, but I have a big presentation to prepare for. Just my luck.

The game itself was fantastic! I couldnn't have predicted that one and overall I would say that it was a truly deserved win by the Saints! The commercials wer mediocre at best though. I wonder what has happened over the past three years in the ad world. It seems that the recession has forced all the major companies to lay off any of their talent. Ultimately I would have to say the evening was entertaining. Moreso for my sister, who actually happened to be there! Too bad she was rooting for the Colts...

Day 38: Golf Lessons

2010-02-07T20:03:00.001-08:00

I know that the wrong sport is represented in the tagline today... being that it is the superbowl and all. The reason it is up there is because I finally got Liz out to a real golf course and went to a real golf range! Verdict??? She LOVED it! We started out slow... with an extra large bucket of balls. I think the important thing about fostering an interest in someone for the game of golf is patience. On both ends for that matter! As a teacher it is very difficult to not see automatice results in your students. What you have to understand is the golf is not an "automatic" process. It take years of practice to develop the muscle memory required to consistently and accurately hit the ball. That being said I was just shooting for her to actually make contact with the ball! Which she did! She nailed a couple nine irons about 70 yards... down the pipe! I was ecstatic with her performance and so was she. She was enjoying so much actually that we went back and got another bucket.

This gives me hope for her journey into the world of lunacy that is the game of golf. To be honest, her swing looked pretty damn good! I am excited to actually find her a club that fits her. I have total faith that her skills will only skyrocket! Now we are off to cook fajitas and watch the big game in the comfort of our living room!

Day 37: Married Life

2010-02-06T20:57:00.000-08:00

While I would be willing to admit that my outlook on life is changing to think more and more toward the big "M" word... I think we all know that I am not quite to there yet.

The reason I bring it up is to segue into my friends house warming party. We just got back and it was a whole lot of fun. They just got married and moved into their first place in Irvine. They had rented out the clubhouse at their complex and we spent the night playing different bar games. All in it was a blast!

All night I had a feeling that there was something different about the party... I couldn't put my finger on it. It wasn't anything bad just... strange. Then I figured it out. EVERYONE there was married save about three people!

Now, I have a lot of married friends, but this was the first time that I personally felt that I had transcended the realm of post college to being an adult. I have been in numerous situations like that numerous times before, but the difference is I saw myself in a different light. This time... there wasn't a difference.

Without realizing it, I guess life has caught up with me, and... I'm okay with it!

Day 36: Activities

2010-02-05T19:52:00.000-08:00

So my wonderful GF Liz came to me earlier this week with a desire to branch out. She stated that she was bored on the weekends and felt that we were letting our youth slip away. It is funny how this conversation coincided with what I had been thinking about as well. With much deliberation and clarification on what she actually meant by the whole thing ( I was kind worried she was dumping me) we set out to create a list of things to do. We wanted to create a hobby that we can both enjoy together! After brainstorming a pretty good amount of ideas we settled on starting out with some cooking classes as well as cultivating her interest in golf.

I know a lot of guys reading this will have just made a sour face, an audible chuckle, or a combination thereof, but I think that it is a great idea to teach her to golf. I really think it is a great sport for couples to learn simply because once the female understands why it is so important she is more likely to be agreeable to you playing with the guys and, moreover, designing trips around playing! That is good for everyone! As far as the cooking classes go... if you made a sour face or a chuckle... you are probably single! If you are, get in a cooking class! Women love guys that know their way around the kitchen and it is a great way to spend some quality time with a lady you may be interested in (cheaper than going out most of the time too).

I look forward to the challenges that are in front of us. I know that deciphering what we can do together isn't always going to be easy, but in the end it will be worth it!

Day 35: X-Ray

2010-02-04T19:41:00.000-08:00

Wow... This week isn't going so great. I went to the doctor today to get an X-Ray on my foot that they had ordered a while back. I believe I have mentioned that I hurt my foot last summer playing soccer while training for the Chicago Marathon. I actually have a condition called Planters Fasciitus. Long story short we all have a tendon under our feet that connects from the heel to ball of our feet. When you don't have proper arch support this tendon can be stretched and irritated. It is VERY hard to heal. It takes time and minimum exertion. This condition doesn't bode well for someone who is trying to run a marathon and is required to run at least 3 miles just about every day of the week.

Let's just say I wasn't very happy when Doc told me I can't run for at least 6 months! That puts a rather large damper on my whole entire year! I now have to do all the things I have been talking about in this blog without actually running!?!? He said that it may heal a bit quicker... in the 3-4 month range. While that is still a long time I may be able to train for LA again next year. So, here I am, at square one...

My plan is to get to the gym more. The workouts are going to consist of 20-30 minutes of elliptical and then in to weight training. I figure I am going to have to work on getting my muscles toned and trim in order to stay off my foot and be ready when I can get back on it. I guess it isn't the end of the world, but it isn't exactly the greatest news ever. I am upset that I can't play soccer, wiffle may have to take a bit of a break, and I can't even walk the golf course...

I will work through this! I have made a commitment to myself and I expect to honor it.

Day 34: 11 Years

2010-02-03T19:18:00.000-08:00

In following yesterday's post I have yet another remembrance. Eleven years ago today I lost the most influential man I have ever known, my father, Walter Lee Weaver Jr. He battled with a form of cancer called Multiple Myeloma for three years. Ultimately I got a call at about 6PM from my mother that I should get a plane ticket home because Daddy just died... I had spoken to him ten minutes earlier. He was 55. My dad loved life and spent every moment he could outside doing something with his hands. He taught me many things about the outdoors such as fishing, hunting, and how to correctly landscape a house. Most important though he taught me what it meant to be a good person, a good husband, and a good Dad.

Half the reason I am doing the project is because I feel that I have watched the last decade go by inactively. I sat in a bar til 2AM on a friday night and completely screwed up the next day. I have only recently had the epiphany that there is much more to life than this. I realized that I am not half the man my father was at my age and it has given me the strength to change that. I wonder what he would say to me if he were still alive. I wonder if I have turned out as he expected, and if I would be in the situation I am in right now if he were there as I was making my mistakes. I know that I will never know the true answers to these questions, but I like to think that he would be proud of me for some of my accomplishments. I also like to think that some of my shames would never have happened.

My father was an amazing guy... the type of man you are proud to call "Daddy." He left Mom with a lot on her plate. I have to say that she is the best Mom, and Dad, a guy could ever ask for. She seems to think that what I am doing now gives him reason to shine a smile down upon me from heaven. I know that I was very lucky to have a great dad for 18 years. Some people never know their father, or worse they know them, but wish they didn't. For that I am thankful, and to all the people out there who's father is still around... take the time to tell them you love them. You never know how long you are going to have them for. One thing is for certain, not a day goes by that I don't miss my father, and I wish that I could tell him I love him right now.

I miss you Dad...

Day 33: Tragedy

2010-02-02T19:00:00.000-08:00

I found out today that a buddy of mine was driving up in Wisconsin at 3:30 in the morning yesterday and lost control of his car. He went of the road and hit two trees. He wasn't wearing his seat-belt! He was ejected from the car... the authorities didn't arrive until 9AM and he was pronounced dead on the scene. Although I wasn't as close to him as a lot of my friends I still feel that he touched my life. Justin Mentell was an amazing person and a fantastic artist. He had a great career in TV and film and had recently decided to focus on painting.

He was younger than me! I spoke with my roommate about it and we both were pretty floored by the whole thing. It puts life into perspective when you lose some one. It is especially difficult when they have so much to offer this world. Justin truly was a great soul. He was always humble and kind. He never had a bad thing to say. His light was bright and now that is gone he will truly be missed. Rest In Peace buddy...

Please visit his website for details on where to make donations.

http://www.justinmentell.com/

Day 32: Numero Dos

2010-02-01T14:16:00.000-08:00

Ahhh February... a month riddled with awesome hollidays and bad movies. We get to look forward to Valentines day, which for men is a very sharp double edged sword. There are the Oscars, which celebrate movies that weren't released in February (the major studios "dumping" month). Most importantly, like a new hole of golf, we get to start over! We can put January behind us and start fresh. There is no need to linger on things if we don't need to. While the past will always affect you, your present will define you, and the future is what you make it!

So here is to a fresh start and living in the present. May you have a great February!

Day 31: One down

2010-01-31T23:44:00.000-08:00

31 days of posts are behind me. I figured I would take a quick glance at how I am coming along... yeah that was pretty quick and not much has changed! I am five pounds lighter and no less in debt. My car is running and is still mine (unfortunately) and I have yet to win the lottery!

All that aside I have made some significant progress in laying the ground work for the next 11 months. I feel confident that I am on the right track. I can't expect everything to just change overnight... unless I win the lottery, which I haven't given up on. I am optimistic about the coming month and feel good about where I'm at... even if it is just a few steps past square one!

Day 30: Golf

2010-01-30T18:15:00.000-08:00

Back on the subject of hobbies... I find it extremely crucial to find something important to you that you're continuously good at. This activity should be relaxing and stress free! It should be a time to become one with your surroundings and thereby make it possible to let go the worries on your mind and achieve something akin to inner peace... if you have ever tried to play golf then you know that it is not what I have just described.

One of my favorite quotes ever goes something along the lines of:

"Golf is like a mistress, if you keep it casual it will be a lot of fun. Tell her you love her and she will break your heart!"
Lee Trevino

Mind you, I really have no basis of comparison for the quote and the game, but I sure can appreciate the analogy. I watch my brother practice and play, and practice and play some more. He is so focused on becoming a scratch golfer that he has become obsessed with the game. Being that I don't have the expendable income that he does I am relegated to going out once every three or four months. I know I am not going to shoot a 72 on that level of practice... and I am okay with that. In fact I shot a 96. I would be lying though if I were to tell you that I don't get frustrated. In fact I hate the damn game! I don't really know why I play it other than the fact that I always know that I have the chance to do better the next time.

For that reason I love the game. You have 18 chances to start over. if you get a 5 on hole one you can get a 3 on hole two to make up for it. It puts life in perspective in a way that few other things can. A man's character can truly be seen on the golf course. Don't ask me how or why, but the best and the worst in people shows up on the course. I am guessing that is why so many companies use it for business deals. The overall key is to realize that this hole is not the end of the world. There are 17 others that you still need to play and they could be entirely different. I try and take that away from the course. In life there are numerous holes of golf, be it a work week, college, marriage, or debt. The key is to remember that all of these things make up a part of your life and that if they are not going according to plan, you can make it up! There will be an opportunity for a par save, but sometimes you need to take a double bogey. When you write down your score the important thing to focus on is not double bogey you are taking now, but the birdie you are about to!

FORE!!!!

Day 29: Extensions

2010-01-29T10:42:00.000-08:00

I'm not here today to talk about creating new hair looks quickly via a multitude of ways to trick the men in your life. Sadly, I am here to talk about something a little more boring. Tax Extensions! I spoke a few days ago about what you can do to get the IRS to work with you on your back taxes. I forgot to mention something very important about tax extensions. For those of you who don't know, a tax extension gives you until October 15th to file your return. That is pretty self explanatory, but what they don't explain is that you still are responsible to pay the balance owed (if there is any) on April 15th.

This is very important because you incur interest and penalties from Uncle Sam on those six months you wait. This also has been known to produce certified mail from the IRS that doesn't say very nice things! The best way to avoid this is to... ready... PAY YOUR TAXES!

On a side note it is hard to neglect the uncanny similarities between being deceived by hair extensions and by tax extensions! They both are meant to look like one thing but are actually something completely different. I am just not quite sure which one is more dangerous!

Day 28: P-Funks V2.0

2010-01-28T19:12:00.000-08:00

I hate that I CONTINUE to smoke!

I know that I said I was going to have everything all wrapped up by the 25th, but I haven't. This is proving to be much more difficult than I expected and I seem to be faltering a bit. My determination is still there... it seems that my will power has decided to take a vacation.

I know I could pick a lot of different excuses for not quitting yet (I have been doing it for years), but it truly comes down to whether or not I care enough about myself to make the choice. Currently I don't give a shit! That has to be the truth, right?!?! What other explanation could there be. I just know that I am feeling worse and worse about the whole thing and it is beginning to get to me.

I can't say what it is going to take to get me to end this decade long affair, but I do know that I am searching for it. I hope that if you are out there searching too that you find your answer. I pray to God that I find mine soon...

Day 27: Taxes

2010-01-27T22:21:00.000-08:00

A while back I received a letter from the IRS trying to discuss my back taxes. First off, let me state that I am by no means in massive tax debt in addition to my other debt. The reality is that I do owe Uncle Sam a few bucks. These past few years have been dificult and I have pushed really hard to make ends meet. That being said... PAY YOUR TAXES! Uncle Sam can be one scary dude. It isn't necessarily a good thing to owe your government money when they are broke!

The thing about it is they will definitely work with you. So, if you are up against the wall with them, give them a call! Surpissingly they can be very aimiable. They set me up on a payment plan that works with my budget and should get me clear in just a few months. So as we move back into tax season I feel like I am prepared to get my next W2... at least until I have to do something with it!

Day 26: Brakes

2010-01-26T21:05:00.000-08:00

That whole "driving my car off a cliff" idea is starting to look better and better by the minute! The brakes on my POS are definitely getting to the point that they need to be changed. I showed them to one of my techs at the shop and he informed me that I was probably going to need a whole new brake assembly which is going to cost around $700. This does not bode well for the debt relief strategy of paying off my credit cards!

Luckily I have a buddy who can get it done for me a little cheaper, but it still doesn't change the fact that I am pissed to have to spend it in the first place. Its not like I wanted to spend the money frivolously anyway... I wanted to do something nice for the GF! Valentines day is coming much quicker than you think... that shit creeps up on you!

I have to believe that when I check my lottery tickets I am going to be 121 MILLION dollars richer tomorrow. So if this is my last post... its because I am RICH! I will still be thinking about you guys anyway, just so you know, on a beach in Costa Rica! If anyone needs to get ahold of me I will be here:

www.thespringscostarica.com

Day 25: Faith

2010-01-25T21:07:00.000-08:00

Today sucked! It seemed that nothing really was going well at work. On my way home I took a second to relax and clear my head. I said a little prayer to myself and assured myself everything was going to be okay. I was pretty worried about my finances when I woke up today and I wasn't quite sure how I could get through the next few weeks. I got home and checked the mail. I had two letters. The first was a check-card from one of my venders for selling a body for a truck. I knew that was coming and that there is no money on it until I deliver this truck. The other letter I didn't know was coming. It was from the manufacturer of the trucks I sell. Apparently someone did some accounting on their end and found out I was owed for a promotion that had going on last year. I new I was going to be receiving a gift card for $300 from them... I was pretty surprised to find out it was just a check for six times the amount! I guess some deals I had done last year came through as well.

I set out to deposit the check and had to stop by the store. For fun, I bought a $2 scratcher ticket... I won $22 dollars! Now, I am a firm believer that good things come in threes and so I quickly purchased a couple of Mega Millions Lottery tickets. The jackpot is $121 Million. I am saying another little prayer right now that nothing good happens to me until about 7PM tomorrow night!

It just goes to show you that a little faith will go a long way. I believe that there are greater forces at work than you or I can see. IF you want something bad enough... it will come to you. More importantly, if you ask hard enough for help... it will be given to you. It isn't always the way you would expect, but most of the time you will look back and notice it was there!

Day 24: Favre

2010-01-24T22:57:00.000-08:00

I think that I am just going to completely give up on football. It would be okay if I liked the Cleveland Browns and Texas A&M. If that were the case I really wouldn't get my hopes up or care too much in the face of utter defeat. But to have watched my Longhorns go down in flames and now my football hero, Brett Farve, choke in almost the EXACT same way as two years ago is almost unbearable. I am at a loss for words.

I think that I am just completely switch over to English Premier League Football/Soccer. Manchester United isn't having a banner year (even though they are only a point out of first) so I think if I make my move now I can wash away any of the hurt before the San Antonio Spurs suck in the NBA!

Red Devils out!

Day 23: Aging

2010-01-23T20:41:00.000-08:00

Week two of wiffle came and went. All in it was a good day. I got some pretty decent exercise and really went after a couple. I may have actually gone too far. As I close in on 30 I have come to realize that I can't do the same things I did ten years ago. I mean... REALLY! Now, some of this may be in part because I am out of shape, but I really think that my body is giving out! I feel as though I need to look into some multi-vitamins and joint care because my knees feel like someone took a sledge hammer to them! I can only imagine how soar my thighs are going to be tomorrow morning.

I guess it is part of the territory and, truthfully, it should only spur me on more! I know that if I can drop fifty pounds that the majority of these issues will take care of themselves. That being said I still get a constant reminder every time I workout that Father Time is a bastard! So seriously, anyone know of a good vitamin... maybe Centrum Silver.

Day 22: Goodwill

2010-01-22T18:00:00.000-08:00

A buddy of mine is a great photographer, and about five months ago he used my condo for a photo shoot. The premise was to have high fashion models in the midst of "mundane things." Mundane things turned out to be me and the GF performing random chores and situations around the house. So technically I'm a model now, and believe me I use the word model in the loosest sense of the word.

I'm excited to see how the photos turned out! We are heading to a viewing party in a little bit to see them all. I believe I may even get a copy to post up here for you guys. I may have to amend this post if that is the case. Anyway, off I go.

Day 21: Food

2010-01-21T19:43:00.000-08:00

I stepped on the scale earlier and I am a little behind where I thought I was going to be at this point. I started out the year at 265 pounds and the scale showed 260 pounds this morning. I guess I shouldn't complain all that much considering I have dropped 5 pounds. I don't know what I was really expecting either. I haven't hit the gym as much as would have liked yet because I have been sick. That being said I guess I have dropped the first five elle bees with diet.

I made a point this year to try very hard to not over eat. I have been making a pretty conscious effort to leave at least 20% of my food on the plate. It doesn't sound like much but if you are eating 2000 calories a day that is almost 3000 calories a week you could walk away from.

It seems to be working so I guess I will continue to roll with it...

Day 20: Karma

2010-01-20T10:00:00.000-08:00

I'm not here today to talk to you about cosmic forces or about how what goes around will eventually come around. I actually wanted to further what I talked about yesterday. One very important factor in getting out of debt is to manage your credit score. Ultimately this is what will decide if can get credit and how much the lending institution will allow you to borrow.

The past two years have been tough on my credit score! The key factor in fixing that is knowing where you stand. It is free to obtain one detailed credit summary a year through the major credit reporting agencies. I recommend everyone do this! There are also various websites that you can pay to see your current score (www.freecreditreport.com). I, however, have found the ultimate site that is truly free!

www.creditkarma.com

They have a wealth of information and useful tips. One function that I find very useful is the "credit simulator." This allows you to see where your credit would be if various positive or negative situations were to take place.

I can't stress how important this is to me and how much it can help you to make sure that you are doing the right thing. Check it out, you don't have a thing to lose and it is always nice to have Karma on your side!

Day 19: DMP's

2010-01-19T20:24:00.000-08:00

About 9 months ago I finally realized that I was in a financial downward spiral. I needed help! I turned to the person I hold in the highest regard of all the world for some advice... my older brother. I wasn't asking for money, I was looking for help. See, I had done everything my brother had told me to do leading up to this point since I first reached out to him three years ago. In all reality I should have been flying high, but the drop off of the economy had left me grounded. I was promised an opportunity that was going to change my financial standing for life. The only thing that had changed in the first year and a half was the amount of credit cards I had.

My brother knew that I was doing everything in my power and so he recommended I talk to someone about my debt. At first I was scared. I didn't want to "settle my debt for a fraction of what I owed" because I knew that it would have ill effects on my credit. My brother continued to tell me that there are different types of services. He sent me a website to check out:

http://www.clearpointfinancialsolutions.org/

I went to the website and filled out the information inquiry. Not long after that I received a phone call from a counselor that took me through the steps of what the counseling service does. He explained that they set up what is called a DMP (Debt Management Plan) to help people get their lives back the right way!

Ultimately I found out that they are there to help! My counselor, Brandon, was really awesome in assisting me to gather all of my debt data. They spoke to my credit card/loan companies and created a plan. What most people don't understand is that the credit card companies have programs to help you to pay them back. Most of these programs won't even effect your credit.

When it was all said and done Brandon had created a payment plan that dropped and consolidated my monthly payments into a manageable single bill that I see results from! The average APR drop was over 10%! 10%!!!!!

I just passed 6 months of being on my Debt Management Plan and have seen my total debt shrink by 25%! That is a massive drop. If I go along at this pace I will be debt free in another year and a half!

The whole point is that there are options! You have ways to get out of your holes! You just have to look for the information. I am supposed to check in with Brandon soon to re-evaluate my situation. I will keep you posted on how things progress as we move along.

Day 18: Globed

2010-01-18T20:00:00.000-08:00

Just a quick post to recap the Golden Globes. First of all, I thought that Ricky Gervais did a great job! I found myself laughing at him more than usual. I particularly liked the fact that he nonchalantly eased the TV audience into the fact that he was pounding beers all night.

I think this is about the only solace he will have to make up for some of his more ill timed jabs, namely at Paul McCartney who was not at all impressed, of the evening. The use of alcohol as an excuse for said jabs worked out splendid, however, when he introduced a seemingly Mel Gibson.

As for the awards, well, it is good to see Sandy Bullock get some praise albeit ironic that the star of Precious still was looked past and under appreciated in real life. Monique was impressive and heartfelt. My inner smile truly broke through while watching her seem so excited. It goes to prove that you too can star in a movie the caliber of Soul Plane and still be considered for top awards some day. That gives me hope. To round things out... Avatar started its run to the Kodak Theater, Nine still sucks, T-bone Burnett should never speak, Martin Scorsese is a very small man, and Robert Downey Jr. should be a comedian. Maybe he can go that route on his 14th career restart! Sadly though, I don't think we will see it.

Overall I think it was a very good evening. The whole ride was a lot of fun and has gotten me ready for the Oscars. Thank you Hollywood Foreign Press!

Day 17: Sickness

2010-01-17T15:41:00.000-08:00

As you may have read earlier, I am training for the Los Angeles marathon. I was supposed to wake up this morning and run 8 miles with my training group. It was raining outside and my throat is about twice the size it should be. I didn't think it was the best idea to take the chance of getting more sick on the run. As much fun as wiffle was yesterday I think I may have pushed a bit too hard. This makes me very worried though because I have missed quite a few weeks of training now and feel that my overall performance is going to be lacking moving into the crunch.

There are really only 8 weeks left to train for the big race and I am beginning to wonder whether that is enough time. I don't want to postpone my race, but I fear I may have to. I know that it is most important to be healthy and ready for the race, but I just don't want to quit. I will feel terrible about the whole thing. I am tired of pushing things out. I know that, again, this is a health concern, but it doesn't make me feel any better about the whole thing.

I guess I will ponder this as I prepare for the Golden Globes...

Day 16: Wiffle

2010-01-16T19:35:00.000-08:00

At 8:45 this morning the 2010 Wiffle Ball season began! I can try to explain to you what this means but I don't think that you can ever truly understand unless you have played it. For those of you that don't know, wiffle ball is baseball with plastic bats and balls. A very simple description for an amazingly complex game! About two years ago a buddy of mine invited me to go play some park wiffle ball with some of his friends. I happily agreed thinking that it would be a fun Saturday morning. That one Saturday turned into five and then another five again. The next thing I know I am three seasons deep of plastic action!

It is pretty well akin to "The Sandlot" when we get together. A group of about ten guys between 25 and 40 acting like they are 12 years old at a time when most people in their right mind are still in a comfortable bed. No matter how late we are out the night before we respect "the wiffle" enough to be bright eyed and at the park ready to connect some plastic.

I am pretty sure that just about all of us have played it at one time or another growing up. We try and keep it fun, but normally our self divided allegiances get the better of us and some serious competition sets in. Today was no different! I hit 4 home runs and brought about 8 runs in throughout our 3 game set. After all that I was the only one to not win a game the whole day. It was ironic though because I had the best stats. The season is young though and I have faith after todays exhibition. The off season training I have done has paid off (no, I didn't train in the off season).

I guess the thing to take away from this is I feel very fortunate to have found something in my life that is simple, yet gives me a lot of joy. It has brought me together with some great people, some of whom I would consider friends that will be in my life for years to come.

So take time to appreciate the little things in your life because often times that is where we get the most joy...

Play Ball!

Day 15: Parliaments

2010-01-15T18:08:00.000-08:00

Soooo...

The smoking thing isn't quite going as I had expected. I am finding it a lot harder to kick the habit than I thought. While I have drastically reduced the overall number that I am smoking I still can't seem to kick it completely. This doesn't help matters much as I have had a chest cold forever four weeks and I can't kick that either.

I truly want to quit! It just seems that I get really stressed out when I see a pack of Parliament Lights and I just have to have one in order to get me through whatever it is I am dealing with!

I know the truth. I know that I am consciously/sub-consciously making and excuse and enabling the habit. I still haven't finished my book that is supposed to make you want to give it up on the spot either. I think I that may be on purpose as well.

I guess it is fitting to follow my own advice and set a sub-goal to have finished the book and be done with smoking by the 25th of this month! That gives me 10 days to get my butt in gear. Now, if only I can remember where I hid that book?!?!?

Day 14: Goals

2010-01-14T17:30:00.000-08:00

As i've said before, I believe that having goals is very important. Most people will sit down January 1st and devise their goals for the coming year. A lot of people will try and shoot for the stars with their goals or establish a goal that is too vague to be accomplished. Often times this is more detrimental that helpful because the goals are too hard to reach and fall quickly out of sight. An easy way to counter-act this is by setting your goals and then creating sub-goals and a plan that will launch you into the heavens.

Let’s look at a new year’s goal that just about all of us has set. We have all told ourselves on January 1st that “this is the year I am getting into shape!” What does that actually mean? We are all in some “shape.” I, for instance, am currently rounded! Such vague goals are the reasons why there is a 45 minute wait for an elliptical machine at the gym until a about January 20th. Twenty days is all it takes for people to get bored, give up, or convince themselves that they don’t look that fat in their size 40 jeans.

Now, if we go back and look at that goal in a different light and start of by saying “this is the year that I get into my target weight range coupled with a healthy body fat percentage!” Automatically we can see a drastic difference in what has been laid forth. By setting this type of goal we have a start, a direction to go in, and a finish. If you do a little research it is easy to find out where you fall on the healthy weight zone scale. This is the start! Let’s say for instance you are 265lbs with 28% body fat. If you are 7’ tall this may be okay. Likely you are more in my range of pretty close to 6’1”. A healthy range for someone my size with a larger bone structure is to be between 190-215lbs with a body fat percentage from 14-18%. That puts me about 50lbs outside my range. This is my direction! Healthy weight loss accomplished by diet and exercise should yield around 10lbs of loss per month for men and around 6-8lbs for women. Knowing that I can deduce it should take me 5 months to get into my healthy range if I hit it hard from the get go. Don't think you have to go balls out from the beginning. Take things slowly! Set sub goals for yourself. Take it in steps. I have compiled an example of the first three months my own personal process to losing 50lbs and 12% body fat (the finish) below.

GOAL- 50lbs and 12% fat loss!

January-

Get a gym membership
Start exercising 2-3 times per week.
Cut out fast food.
Cut back on beer.
Drink one glass of water for every soda.

February-

Increase exercising to 3-4 times per week.
Pick up a sport.
Switch to diet soda.
Drink 2-3 liters of water a day.

March-

Increase length and intensity of workouts.
Switch from beer to vodka.
Increase the amount of home cooked meals you eat.

By creating sub-goals that you can monitor on a day to day basis the end result is much easier to attain. I promise that if you were to follow that brief three month plan alone you would see a drastic change in your appearance. The same rules apply to things like personal debt. If you want to be out of debt in 2010 then start by paying your highest interest rate credit cards off first. Set a goal to take care of one card every two months and make the small changes in your life to attain that goal.

I know this post was a bit long winded, but it is amazing information that has been passed onto me. I promise if you heed it you will not be one of the people that vanish from the gym on the 20th! Good luck.

Day 13: Commitment

2010-01-13T23:52:00.000-08:00

So I was looking at my profile and I see that I have " 11 views (approx)." What does that even mean? There have been approximately 11 people that have read this so far? Does that mean that 11 people clicked on this blog, but one guy was watching TV at the same time so that doesn't really count? Or could it be that it counted my mom twice for when she clicked back before the page had finished loading because she thought the internet was broken when in actuality it was because she is still running on a 56K modem? I mean, get with it Mom! I think I read somewhere the other day that the Amish just got DSL.

Whatever the truth may be it isn't really a shock to me. I actually haven't really told anyone that I am doing this. There is no real way to find this unless you ran across this by sheer luck. I am okay with that for now because I am doing this to prove a point to me first. I am tired of telling people that I am going to do something and never actually getting it done. Now, it should be stated for the record that I am not a quitter! I just overlap things to a point that time doesn't always permit me to see things through to fruition. For instance, I was too busy eating pizza and watching football on Saturday to go running. I had the best intentions. Well, we all know where good intentions lead.

The point is that this is supposed to be about me changing those parts of my life. And while I kid about the pizza and football; I do feel that I need to really work on my follow through. As you may have read a while back I am training for the Los Angeles marathon right now. The problem is that I have been sicker than a dog for the past month. I don't know how many of you have ever tried to run with a chest cold, but it isn't pretty. The excuse is there for me to take it and back down. I don't think anyone would say a thing. I would know though! Deep down inside of me I would know that I took the cop out. I am not going to let that happen any more!

Whether it be with work, exercise, friendship, or love I refuse the cop out! This is not easy! In fact this is one of the harder things I have had to do in my life. I just have to set my focus and work toward my goals. Every day that I wake up and choose to commit to something, in whatever sense it may be, is one more in the bag.

For what it is worth, I promise to get through these 365 days! When you think about it... that is a pretty hefty promise to make to approximately 11 people!

Day 12: Alchemy

2010-01-12T21:02:00.000-08:00

One of the first things I did as the new year started was to pick up my fifth copy of the book "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho. I have had five copies of the book because every time I buy it I read through it and pass it on to someone else that hasn't read it. If you only listen to one thing I every write in this silly blog let this be it...

READ THIS BOOK FOR IT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE!

The book is an easy read. You can curl up with it on a rainy afternoon and be done by dinner. The story follows a young shepherd from Andalusia who seeks his fortune at the base of the pyramids of Giza. The boys quest is one of happenstance that quickly evolves into the discovery of his own personal legend. I won't go to deep into the story, but I promise you that you will never look at life the same once you read the final page. It truly is a masterpiece. It is very rare that ones soul can truly be uplifted in the course of 192 pages, but this will do it. Now, go to the little search bar on the right of this post and plug the book in! Buy 2 copies, or five even, as you will want to share this with people as I share it with you!

What are you waiting for??? GO!

Day 11: Perseverance

2010-01-11T20:45:00.000-08:00

Back to work after quite a weekend. I woke up this morning to head off to work and as I began to pull out of my garage I was greeted with a long piercing whine. I paused for a moment and had a few words with the X-terror which, after being edited for this blog, sounded something along the lines of "hey... you silly machine... why are you acting so strange? I can't believe I am still paying for you! I wish that you would find a happy home with someone else with out me knowing it!" Granted, there were a LOT of explicitives and that was the extremely paraphrased version.

After I felt a bit of the tension release from my ongoing frustration I returned to the problem at hand. I reversed a little more and the whine came back. It was pretty obvious to me that the alarm on the brakes had begin to sound (for those of you who don't know, most brakes are designed to whistle/whine when the brake pads have worn to a certain degree). I looked into replacing them and it is likely going to cost me around $300 dollars! DAMNIT!

It may be a bit confusing as to why I titled this post perseverance. I feel that my X-terror is a prime example. Why you may ask? Well that is easy! Not a single day goes by that I get in that vehicle that I am not reminded of past mistakes. Every time I pay that bill and I see the 20% interest rate next a buyout amount that hasn't moved in two years staring me in the face I want to cry! As I watched the odometer roll over 90,000 miles I waved bye to additional $2k in value to the car. This effectively placed the car so far upside down it should be in Australia! It really isn't the poor old boys fault, he has been pretty good to me, but then again, it wasn't Old Yeller or Kujo's fault either!

The point is that everyday I am reminded of these mistakes and it gives me the strength to continue to dig out of it. It lights a fire in me that makes me want to sell 20 units in a month so I can be rid of the damn thing once and for all! It is important to push through and persevere your adversity and ultimately only you can do it. Utilize the problems in your life to discover solutions and it will be easy to overcome anything that may come your way.

Day 10: Goodbyes

2010-01-10T21:28:00.000-08:00

I just dropped my friend off at the airport. It was kinda sad to see him go. I was talking with a buddy of mine back in Texas earlier about how lucky my group of friends are to have found each other. I know everybody has their " best friends," but my guys are pretty top notch. I can't rightly express on this page what genuinely good people they are. The majority of the group is back in Texas. Bi-weekly I get a half-hearted phone call asking when I am going to move back. They all understand that I have some amazing things going on out here (namely the GF) and I am not heading back any time soon.

It makes me wonder though whether or not I am in the correct place, if I am doing the right thing for me, and if I could be happier back in Texas (with the GF of course). I struggled a lot in my transition out of the film industry because I know deep in my heart that I am supposed to be a part of it. It took a lot for me to say goodbye to film and yes to doing something else. I was burnt out with my work and I needed to re-center my life. It is a precarious line to walk though because when one walks away from something new questions arise as to if they did the right thing. For example, if I am not in the film industry why I am I still out here and not closer to my family?

I am so afraid of making the wrong choices with my life! I dwell on the decisions I make until I have worked every possible angle, but the future always will throw curve-balls at you. The key is to try to make decisions that are going to make you happy. That way when you say goodbye you will have no regrets!

Day 9: Hangovers

2010-01-09T20:20:00.000-08:00

Holy bajeebus! This weekend is flying by. It is great having my best friend in town and I am showing him around as best I can. The one thing about getting together with friends I haven't seen in a while is that the beer in my fridge seems to multiply at an exponential rate. So much so that they start overflowing into the local restaurants and, inevitably, the bars situated close to those restaurants. It is strange because I somehow feel it my duty to reclaim said beers from the establishments so as to not inconvenience them. I pay them a fee for any space they may have taken up and then I happily drink them down knowing they are safely in a good home. For the night... all is well.

The other problem with catching a few drinks with friends you haven't seen in years is that you inevitably revert back to thinking you are as young as you were when you last saw one another. This would be fine if you didn't drink accordingly. All I can say is that I am DEFINITELY not 27 any more. Which, when you think about it, is a pretty sad statement in itself. Needless to say my head is killing me!

The things I do know are that:

1. The hangover is probably worth it.
2. Who am I kidding... no it isn't!
3. For me to get skinny I am going to have to let those beer gremlins go home with someone new for a while.

I will touch more on the caloric reasoning for statement three as we get further along.

Day 8: Smoking

2010-01-08T12:24:00.000-08:00

I have been a smoker since I was 18. I am not proud of it, and as time goes by I feel that I am looked down upon more and more. When I first started smoking it was acceptablr just about anywhere you went. Now I litterally have to do it in a designated space on the street in front of my appartment. I legally can't even smoke on my balcony. I have had just about enough. It has gotten to the point that I go driving around just to smoke.

I can truly say that I am ready to quit. I have quit multiple times in the past, but this time is different. I am spending this year on me and I have to do this! It is time! I have to do this... for no one other than myself!

Wish me luck in the process...

Day 7: Disappointment

2010-01-07T22:50:00.000-08:00

You know... I was really hoping that we could have pulled it out!

For those of you that watched the BCS National Championship game you know what I am referring to. Texas lost tonight and the final score doesn't do the game justice. Alabama played well, and they effectively only had to beat our second string team due to Colt McCoy's early injury.

I am actually running short on words right now, but I will say that life is consistently going to present you with disappointments. To quote the best boxer of all time, Rocky Balboa,

"it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now if you know what you're worth then go out and get what you're worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not point fingers"

I think I will leave it at that!

Day 6: Friends

2010-01-06T21:17:00.000-08:00

I have to say that I think I was blessed with some of the most amazing friends in the world. A lot of people will tell you that they have friends that will take a bullet for them. While some may be telling the truth I would say about 80% of those people are either lying through their teeth or just oblivious. I, on the other hand, can honestly say that I have 8 to 10 guys and ladies in my life that truly would.

I happened to go to The University Of Texas... tomorrow is a BIG deal! For those of you who don't know tomorrow is the BCS National Championship game is being held in Pasadena. My best friend in the world arrived tonight at 6:15. He hasn't been to LA in 18 years. We just got back from a little restaurant called Father's Office. If you are in the Santa Monica area go there!

I'm excited for tonight, I'm excited for this weekend, and I'm excited for you if you are lucy enough to have people in your life that are as special to you as my friends are to me!

Day 5: Finance

2010-01-05T23:31:00.000-08:00

I have to admit that the fantastical day dreams I had as a wide eyed college graduate do not quite match up to my current financial state. I had pictured myself at this point being a high powered movie producer with a big house and a BMW M3 in the driveway. Truth be told, I have an apartment and a 2004 Nissan Xterra. The Xterra (or Xterror as I like to call it) serves as a mode of transportation to my day job as a Peterbilt truck salesman, but it also happens to hold the record as the most expensive Xterra ever sold!

Don't be misled here, there is absolutely nothing special about this truck! I paid $21K for it off the showroom floor in 2004. However, due to lack of experience, a bit of stupidity, and two ill thought out refinances I still owe $15,256 on the thing with a monthly payment of $486. When it is all said and done I will have paid around $54,000 for the damn thing. This is particularly vexing because a 2010 BMW M3 is $53,000! I will delve more into this topic later when I discuss why you should never refinance your vehicle and how Wells Fargo is the devil!

I digress from the point of my dreams and my reality not matching up. This is important because they definitely do NOT! Anyone who reads this that is in sales knows what the last two years have been like... shitty, What compounds this situation is that I had zero savings when I switched careers and moved into sales. For the greater part of the past two years I have been juggling credit cards and loans in order to get me over the proverbial "hump" to lay some solid groundwork with my finances. This elusive "hump" has yet to show up. In fact the only hump of any sort I have managed to locate is a seemingly insurmountable mountain of debt that has been topped off by a flag that some crooked banker erected with a smile to read "Average APR 18.9%." Needless to say that this has done wonders for my credit score. The damage has been done though. I had spent the previous four years making up for horrible college credit card mistakes, and now I will be spending the next few on these.

In my darkest hour, when I was at least a month behind on just about every bill I have, I decided to take a stand. I took some very good advice and got some help straightening out my debt. I have been holding steady and have started to chip away a little bit at a time. In the coming months I am going to share with you what I have done to get my head back above water. I no longer feel lost and anxious when it comes to my debt. I am not where I envisioned myself 8 years ago, but that is okay for today. I still have some time to get that M3!

So here I am, a 29 year old impromptu mountain climber ready to scale that mountain of debt. The one thing I know for certain is that when I reach the top I too will erect a flag (after burning the current one) that will read "DEBT FREE."

Then... I will smile!

Day 4: The Weigh In

2010-01-04T20:02:00.001-08:00

First day back to work and the start of a brand new year! Although normally my office is full of the hustle and bustle of numerous people running around with heavy tools working on very expensive machinery that was not the scene today! Today as I walked into the office the setting was more like a glamorous press conference the week before a long awaited prize fight. The scale was ready and our makeshift scoreboard was created.

All in there are 7 contenders vying for the "Great 2010 Slimdown" crown. Various weights were measured and recorded until finally my turn arose. As I strode up to the scale I grabbed as many various office supplies of considerable weight as I could. Once I had stuffed a stapler, a tape dispenser, a box of binder clips, paperclips, a maglite, and a monkey wrench into my hands and pockets I took my place on the scale. Unfortunately my plan was thwarted due to the fact that I took all of these items in front of everyone else and they didn't seem to think that it was the most, shall I say, "accurate" measure. So after unloading enough stock off my personage to keep a small Office Max running for a week I stepped back up on the scale...

265 pounds!

HOLY HELL! That scale had to be wrong (I hope)! Either way it was wrong across the board and now I have a starting point to get things going. Which I have done. I came home and headed directly to my room to change and get my ass onto pavement jogging. I knocked out about three miles and felt pretty good.

I know this isn't going to be easy, but I am doing it for a good reason...

Day 3: Health

2010-01-03T22:02:00.001-08:00

I wasn't always fat. Not too long ago I was actually in pretty decent shape, and I know exactly when things started to change. Two years and one month ago I completely changed my career. I went from following my dreams to working for the man in around two weeks. Mind you, this was the wise decision at the time. Sometimes though, the wise decision isn't always the best one for us. By "us" I mean our souls... who we are on the most primal front. Change is always difficult for humans and this situation was no different.

I slowly watched as I gained five pounds. Those five pounds turned into ten. The next thing I knew that ten had turned into a gain of forty five pounds in eight months. FORTY FIVE pounds in less than a year folks...

...

I actually just sat and stared at the last line for about two minutes still trying to wrap my head around the whole thing. It is still hard for me to believe. I think it is safe to say that what caused the weight gain and how it occurred can be fodder for a lot of posts in the future, but for now what we need to focus on is what is currently being done about the situation.

Tomorrow morning starts "the great office slim down of 2010." This is one of a few things that I am doing right now to actively lose weight. I will get into the other things soon, I promise, just bear with this one for now. About half of my office is entering into a contest tomorrow morning to see who can lose the highest percentage of their body weight in 90 days. It fits pretty amazingly with what I am trying to do right now so naturally I am all about it. We are all going to weigh-in and keep track of where we are at every Friday for the next three months. I am actually really excited about the whole thing. That being said, I totally pigged out today in anticipation. Domino's chicken bacon ranch pizzas should be illegal! Seriously!

I think it is very easy for all of us to agree that the way we perceive ourselves in the mirror really plays into how the rest of the world sees us. Their perception is based on how we present ourselves to them. If we are not happy with what we see in the mirror then how can we expect to present ourselves to others in a manner for them to feel any different? By changing our outer appearance to something that we are proud of we automatically change our inner selves. We automatically will feel better! Gradually, as we feel better, the way we project ourselves changes too. This ultimately leads us to being all around happier people!

This is one of the easiest concepts for people to grasp and one of the hardest to actually act upon. I just hope that this contest gives me a little motivation to get going.

Wish me luck on the weigh-in!

Day 2: The Plan

2010-01-02T21:12:00.000-08:00

What an amazing day! I took a long bike ride up to Malibu today and the scenery did its best to remind me that where I live does NOT suck! The time spent on those two wheels quickly reminded me that...

A) I haven't ridden a bike in close to ten years.
B) my butt is really REALLY going to hurt tomorrow.
C) If I am really going to make these 365 days work for me I need a plan.

The plan I have laid out to this point is to set small goals and work on a lot of different fronts. The three major areas I want to work on are health, financial, and career. While the second and third areas are somewhat connected they are very separate when it comes to making me happy. Money will help to make my debt disappear, but it wont take my soul to a place that I can find true happiness.

Throughout the next 365 days I will layout individual goals and plans to achieve them. By fixing the parts, theoretically, the sum of the whole will ultimately be fixed as well.

And that... will lead to a better me!

Day 1: A New Beginning

2010-01-01T19:29:00.000-08:00

Let's start with this, I am 29 years old, overweight, in debt, and unmarried. I don't own a house. I don't have a dog. My car loan is so upside down that I am seriously contemplating driving it off a cliff to claim the insurance money. And to top it all off I am ostracized by the majority of the denizens of my native Santa Monica, CA because I tend to occasionally smoke 20 cigarettes a day. All that being said I do have one important thing... hope! I have hope for change. I have the desire to make the necessary changes needed in my life to turn all the aforementioned ailments around and I believe it is going to take me roughly 365 days! One year. An important and pivotal year in my life journey. I mean, I Am turning freaking 30 this year and that alone is stress enough. On top of that... I want to overhaul my life!

and to that, Hooray for 2010...

It's a new year and a new decade. Our economy seems to be trudging out of the murky depths and many Americans are hoping to put a very rough couple of years behind them. The thought of a new and prosperous future looms just inside our reach and I, like many others, am choosing to grasp at it.

I have a decent job, a college education, and a nice apartment close to the beach. I am blessed with wonderful friends, a caring family, and an amazing girlfriend that treats me exceptionally well. I would say that I have a pretty great base to initialize the transcendence out of my own mire and into the person I want to be.

Each day I am going to move a bit closer to where I want to be and each day I am going to put it all on the table for you to see. I am not planning on coming out the other side of the 365 married, in a four bedroom house with a white picket fence, raising 2.5 kids, and driving an Aston Martin with my golden retriever Jake's tongue flailing in the breeze. I do however plan on being debt free, 60 pounds lighter, and a non-smoker! I want to be ready to take the next step in my life. Okay, I guess I can throw the dog and a new car in too.

To quote the great Bill Murray in WHAT ABOUT BOB? -

"Baby steps to the elevator. Baby steps into the elevator. Im in the elevator. IM IN THE ELEVATOR!"

I'm in the elevator...